Hickory Hank’s Glitz & Gab: BWE, 1924-style

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Hickory_hank_3_7Good afternoon dames and gents.  Hickory Hank here to fill you in on whats buzzing in the biz.  Let’s get a wiggle on. 

Looks like Jude Law gave Sienna Miller the old icy mitt.  Seems Jude wasn’t too keen about Ms. Miller having a soiree with the next 007 himself, Daniel Craig.  Word on the street is that Sienna isn’t taking the breakup well.  Seems like Law gave her a bum’s rush out the door.  Guess his favorite color is… burnt Sienna

In happier news, Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore tied the knot.  That dame might be over the hill but she’s got a pair of gams that won’t quit.  â€œDude, where’s my car?” is something Kutcher could be hearing from Moore in the next five years… as she approaches senility!   

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are expecting.  Some people say it’s thanks to the chemistry, but if you ask me it sounds more like… science fiction!

Congrats to Jessica Biel on being voted the World’s Sexiest Woman.  I’m not feeding you a line, Beil is the bee’s knees.  She makes Eva Longoria look like a bug-eyed Betty.   I wouldn’t mind it if she took ol’ Hickory Hank to… seventh heaven!

Dennis Rodman’s new tell-all book “I Should Be Dead By Now” is out.  He claims that ex-flame Carmen Electra attempted to shove spaghetti in his can.  Rodman’s probably just chewing gum but who knows what Electra is like in the sack?  She seems like a bearcat and a half.  If she wants spaghetti… I’m scrambling to find the sauce

Fox has cancelled The Simple Life.  Woof! Woof! My heart is breaking for Paris & Nicole.  Jeepers creepers, these two have been ridden more than the Cyclone at Coney… and for half the price! 

Well that’s all for now folks.  I have to go see a man about a dog.  Tune back next time for the next “Glitz ‘n Gab!”