The Seed of Gallo

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Vincent_gallo

Director Vincent Gallo is selling his sperm on his website. Just like Steven Spielberg does!

Hoping to offend as many people at one time as possible, here are a couple of lines from the description.

  • There are no known genetic deformities in his ancestry (no cripples) and no history of congenital diseases.
  • Though a fan of Franco Harris, Derek Jeter, Lenny Kravitz and Lena Horne, Mr. Gallo does not want to be part of that type of integration.
  • Under the laws of the Jewish faith, a Jewish mother would qualify a baby to be deemed a member of the Jewish religion. This would be added incentive for Mr. Gallo to sell his sperm to a Jew mother, his reasoning being with the slim chance that his child moved into the profession of motion picture acting or became a musical performer, this connection to the Jewish faith would guarantee his offspring a better chance at good reviews and maybe even a prize at the Sundance Film Festival or an Oscar.
  • If you have seen The Brown Bunny, you know the potential size of the genitals if it’s a boy. (8 inches if he’s like his father.)

Unfortunately for Vincent, I don’t think anybody’s seen The Brown Bunny.

So come on people, who’s going to step up and buy Vinnie’s sperm for $1 million? Any takers? (no pun intended)