The Seed of Gallo



Director Vincent Gallo is selling his sperm on his website. Just like Steven Spielberg does!

Hoping to offend as many people at one time as possible, here are a couple of lines from the description.

  • There are no known genetic deformities in his ancestry (no cripples) and no history of congenital diseases.
  • Though a fan of Franco Harris, Derek Jeter, Lenny Kravitz and Lena Horne, Mr. Gallo does not want to be part of that type of integration.
  • Under the laws of the Jewish faith, a Jewish mother would qualify a baby to be deemed a member of the Jewish religion. This would be added incentive for Mr. Gallo to sell his sperm to a Jew mother, his reasoning being with the slim chance that his child moved into the profession of motion picture acting or became a musical performer, this connection to the Jewish faith would guarantee his offspring a better chance at good reviews and maybe even a prize at the Sundance Film Festival or an Oscar.
  • If you have seen The Brown Bunny, you know the potential size of the genitals if it’s a boy. (8 inches if he’s like his father.)

Unfortunately for Vincent, I don’t think anybody’s seen The Brown Bunny.

So come on people, who’s going to step up and buy Vinnie’s sperm for $1 million? Any takers? (no pun intended)

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