Here are the top 5 films people paid their hard-earned money to see this week:
1. Unnecessary re-make of a classic film starring an actor whose increasingly desperate need for artistic legitimacy results in a misguided attempt to fill the impossibly large shoes of one of cinema’s greatest comedic geniusus — $21.7 million
2. Completely unnecessary SECOND sequel to a ridiculous teen horror film that should have gone straight to video the first time around, but has somehow managed to become a trilogy – $20.1 million
3. Adaptation of a popular and recognizable series of children’s books that replaces the creativity of the originals with a couple random movie stars and the desperate hopes that the name brand will be strong enough to sucker people into theaters (and judging by the 3rd place debut, it wasn’t) – $15.3 million
5. A teenage babysitter gets harassed by a deranged killer (from inside the house!) for oh, I don’t know…about the bajillionth time since the 1980’s – $10 million
Once again, Hollywood – you keep making great films, we’ll keep rewarding you by coming to see them!