WHILE YOU WERE GOING TO THE BADA-BING

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  • The first episode of The Sopranos is "amazing, instantly re-addictive" "shocking" and "as good as TV ever gets." I can’t wait until Sunday! (First time I’ve thought that in a while.) 
  • NBC Universal is paying more than $15 million to HBO for the cable rights to Six Feet Under. And then NBC Universal died alone in its kitchen after choking on a sandwich.
  • Kim Cattrall has signed on to Elton John‘s TV show which centers on a gay British rock star and his manager (Cattrall), a role originally written for a man. So now instead of a ladies’ man playing the field, the manager will be known as a tramp.
  • Michael Jackson was ordered to close his Neverland Valley Ranch and was fined $169,000 for failing to pay his employees or maintain proper insurance. I’m starting to think there might be something wrong with Jackson.
  • David and Victoria Beckham have settled their libel suit against the British tabloid News of the World over allegations their marriage was a sham. In the tabloid’s defense, they meant to write "shame." (Because they’ve got a crush on David.)
  • David Lee Roth of spent "four hours yesterday telling his bosses where they could stick their ideas" because they want him to copy Howard Stern. There’s no better way to separate yourself from Stern than dissing your bosses.