While You Weren’t Cheating On Your Taxes, But Just Flirting A Little

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  • MonsterGLAAD is honoring Charlize Theron for her efforts in improving the image of the gay community by playing a terrifying lesbian serial-killer in Monster.
  • Are Jude Law and Sienna Miller getting back together?  Doesn’t matter – just use this as an opportunity to visualize the kind of make-up sex they would have.
  • Melanie Griffith is being sued for not revealing the name of the fashion designer responsible for how she looked at a recent red carpet appearance.  Following suit, the drug company that makes Xanax is planning a massive lawsuit against all of Hollywood. 
  • Rapper Nelly wants to do more acting, but isn’t ready to cry on cue yet.  Not to worry, though – once he’s blown through what’s left of his "hasn’t been hot in herrre in awhile" fortune on gold teeth and diamond-plated bathroom floors, he’ll be sobbing like Sally Field on Oscar night.
  • A prison guard was recently disclipined after screening Brokeback Mountain for the inmates.  He defended himself by insisting that it was "a real crowd-pleaser".
  • Is Jamie-Lynn Spears finally ready to follow in her big sister’s footsteps and become a smoking hot sex symbol before spiraling deeper and deeper into a confusing of  unattractiveness and self-destruction?