Sir Math-A-Lot

|

Sirmixalot_1
(S+C) x (B+F) / (T-V)

Ladies, do you have any idea what the golden ratio shown above really means?  If not, you might want to put down that beauty magazine for a moment and brush up on your math skills, because what you’re looking at is the recently-discovered scientific equation for the perfect butt

Find out how to breakdown your buns, hun – and mine – after the jump.

First, a woman assesses her assets on a scale from 1 to 20 (1 being worst and 20 best) in the following categories:

* S = overall shape (a ripe peach being just about right)

* C = circularity (rounder is better)

* B = bounciness (less wobble is preferred)

* F = firmness (too much push to that cushion loses points)

* T = skin texture (no cellulite, please)

Then, calculate:

* V = the ratio of one’s hips to waist.

Finally, let’s the math, shall we?  I’ll show you what I’m workin’ with if you show me!  To give you some context, the Perfect Score (Kylie Minogue, say) is an 80. 

ME: (12 + 16) x (18 + 15)/(19 – 1.17) = 51

Dear god, what does that mean!?!?