While You Were Selling Your Stuff For Gas Money
- Mandy Moore was horrified when she noticed that Cosmopolitan magazine ran the headline “Orgasms Unlimited” next to her face. Boyfriend Zach Braff, meanwhile, bought copies for everybody he knows.
- The rumor that the original cast of Saved by the Bell is reuniting to produce 30 new episodes of the show is nothing more than a big joke. The culprit believed to be behind the whole thing? Zack Morris, of course.
- Critics hate Elton John’s new vampire musical. They think it sucks! Get it? Vampires! Suck! Oh man, that was TOO EASY! WOO!
- Angelina and Brad will name their baby “Africa” because Angelina loves Africa. Thankfully, the child wasn’t born seven years ago when Angelina would have probably named it “Lesbians.”
- Britney Spears has already fired her nanny. K-Fed is said to be extremely upset that he didn’t even get the chance to bone her first.