• HEADLINE: “Exxon Quarterly Profit 5th Highest Ever” (AP)
  • MISGUIDED OUTRAGE: Jay Leno is being criticized for bad gay jokes, yet continues getting away with all the bad everything else jokes. (Canada.com)
  • SCARIEST PREDATOR SINCE ‘THE PREDATOR': Police released sketches depicting a truly terrifying rape suspect. (DoubleViking)
  • CRUSHING, TORTUROUS DISAPPOINTMENT: Jessica Alba ALMOST let a nipple slip. Sorta like being one number away from winning the lottery. (Egotastic)
  • YESTERDAY’S GARBAGE: Amy Fisher is blaming her use of ecstasy for her decision to shoot Joey Buttafuoco’s wife in the face back in 1992. (Yahoo! News)
  • SPECIAL OLYMPICS GOLD MEDALIST: Judge Judy, who has the top daytime court show for the 500th straight week. (Netscape News)
  • FAD YOU SHOULD PRAY DOESN’T CATCH ON: Internet slang jewelry – ‘OMG’ is right. (BoingBoing)
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