Cruise: “But, Pirating Is Wrong!”

|

cruisethumbsup.jpgAs Tom Cruise was walking out of LA’s Scientology Center, feeling renewed and invigorated after his latest audit, his newfound tranquility was tragically cut short when a deranged, misguided Ethan Hunt fan approached him seeking an autograph – on a bootleg copy of M:I3! After his initial horror subsided, Cruise immediately lept into action, giving the wayward cinema enthusiast an impromptu lesson on the laws governing copyrighted entertainment, raising his voice and snarling, “NO, this is wrong… wrong, wrong, WRONG!”.

After personally – personally – doing his part to battle movie piracy, Cruise dragged the offender back into the Scientology center where the man’s negative illegal-downloading thetans were dutifully removed.