Jack Osbourne announced yesterday that he has closed a deal with a publisher to release his memoir. Through our shadowy network of media operatives, BWE.tv was able to procure the ENTIRE text of the autobiography, which will be the shortest in history, considering he was only 20 years old when he wrote it. Here it is, unabridged, for you all to enjoy:
My dad’s weird so my family was on TV and I got wasted a lot until I had to stop partying so much then I went to rehab and lost weight. THE END
Riveting stuff – we might have a regular Hemingway on our hands here.