While You Were Canceling Your Jenny Craig Meal Order

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  • Rachel Weisz gives birth to baby boy. Not the new messiah so who cares.
  • Jamie Foxx has sex everyday for 30 minutes to keep his body in shape, and his ding-dong herpi-fied.
  • Brad Pitt was scared to death during birth. Not of labor, of impending apocalypse.
  • Nicole Kidman won’t have sex with Keith Urban until her wedding night. She was married to Tom Cruise for 10 years so she’s probably still a virgin.
  • Kirstie Alley needs to spend some more quality time with Jenny Craig.
  • Britney is back in her baby-hurting convertible. But this time Sean won’t set foot inside.
  • What do you get when you cross a Blue Man with a Playmate and a Carrot Top ? The best season of Surreal Life ever.
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