While You Were Watching Ellen Cut a Rug

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paris

  • James Blunt is definitely dating Petra Nemcova . After seeing her face in a crowded place, he clearly knew what to do.
  • Donald Trump to produce game show version of Monopoly. But it’s just his excuse to wear a top hat and coattails.
  • Lindsay Lohan pisses off Anna Wintour with her endless trips to the bathroom at the CFDA awards. But forms an unbreakable bond with the bathroom attendant.
  • DJ’s say Paris’ new single is hard to ridicule because it’s not half bad. Lucky for VJ’s, the video is atrocious.
  • Britney’s mom calls on “Christian life coach” to save Brit and K-Fed’s marriage. But Jesus isn’t sure if he loves them.
  • Naomi Campbell is trying for a baby. Or rather, harvesting her own maid/personal assistant/Blackberry target.
  • Katie Holmes’s ex, Chris Klein finds love again.Or as he sees it, another woman to lose to an Operating Thetan Level 8.