This morning’s Regis and Kelly really classed things up with guests Paris Hilton and Janice Dickinson. While we couldn’t really understand Paris’ boring, incoherent rambling, our patented Celebrity Translator was able to fill us in on what exactly she was talking about. Incidentally, when we tried to use the Translator on Janice Dickinson’s portion of the show, it didn’t work because she isn’t a celebrity.

If you’d like to try your luck deciphering Paris without the help of the Celebrity Translator, here’s a clip of her appearance on Letterman last night. See what you can make of it, but it just sounds like gibberish to me.

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