SIZZLER (literally): Ozzy’s Hellish House Fire!


ozzy_fire.jpgThe England estate of metal god Ozzy Osbourne was engulfed in hellish flames after an electric demonic lamp shorted out, causing a small-but-evil fire that fortunately – or unfortunately, depending on how much you’re into Sabbath – was extinguished quickly, and did not result in a Satanic offering of scorched Osbourne flesh. Nobody was hurt (no, not even the kids), and the fire only caused minor smoke damage, but the whole thing was still pretty f*cking metal. After the initial shock (or flashback) wore off, Ozzy mumbled something about his excitement to return home and resume his regular existence as a tragic-but-amusing weirdo drug-casualty.

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