While You Were Testing Long-Range Missles
- Jennifer Lopez’s ex-husband claims the star practices voodoo and casts spells on her exes. And finally, the mystery of what really happened to Diddy’s P. is solved.
- Aaron Spelling’s widow plans on selling the mansion they lived in for $150 million. Though she’d be willing to give daughter Tori a family discount and cut it down to $149 million.
- Dakota Fanning has been selected to join the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences. Her publicist called the nomination the final step in her plan to turn the 12-year-old into a creepy middle aged woman.
- Michael Jackson has turned to Eminem for help. Though its unclear if it’s to help him record a new album or for tips on how to kill his ex-wife.
- Rush Limbaugh has been cleared in Viagra probe. And I sincerely hope that that’s the last time you ever see the words “Limbaugh”, “Viagra”, and “probe” in the same sentence ever again.