In Today’s Random Lesbian News, Circa 1989

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foster2.bmpWhen we first found out that Jawbone Sally, aka Jodie Foster, was “together” (air quotes signifying relations of the sexual nature) with bombshell Kim Basinger, we thought “Move over, Oprah and Gayle! There’s a new lesbian sherriff in town!” An Ebay listing for a “Dirt Alert” sent to an employee at the David Hockney studios confirmed that the two A-list actresses were indeed an item, albeit way back when in 1989. While the news may seem surprising, color us unimpressed. You just know Foster is hiding a thicket of Baldwin-esque chest hair, and would no doubt kick his ass in a wife-beating competition.

In other lesbian news, Jake Gyllenhaal is slated to play Lance Armstrong in his upcoming biopic. So that explains their undeniable sexual chemistry!