SIZZLER: Baruch Atah A-Denial

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GIBSTEIN.JPGMessage to Jews: Buckle up for the best Yom Kippur ever. Never will the taste of your own dry saliva seem sweeter than when Mel Gibson is delivering the keynote address at your temple. Los Angeles Rabbi David Baron had the foreskin to invite Gibson to speak at his synagogue on Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement. The L.A. Temple of the Arts boasts the largest number of Yids in the entertainment industry (making it also the headquarters for at least half-a-million conspiracy theories), and would be the ideal Semitic Debutante’s Ball for Gibson to “come out” at. What makes the invitation so appealing are the possibilities… Gibson, tanked on Manischevitz and gefilte fish, cracking his awkward opening joke — “Boy, is it just me, or is it an oven in here?” — following that up with some delightful Lethal Weapon-esque stigmata comparison, and capping it off with a heartfelt apology, given while running his hands over the head of the Rabbi’s wife checking for… lice. He’s like your crazy, racist, Malibu-owning Uncle you love to hate. I’ve already cleaned my fridge and reserved my ticket in anticipation. (Image courtesy of the Mel Gibstein t-shirt.)

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