• 418007.jpgAn elderly couple in India committed suicide because their dog died. Now if only Paris Hilton would show that kind of commitment…
  • Last night the Florida Gators became the first college basketball team in 15 years to win back-to-back national championships. That chick in your office who’s never watched a second of basketball in her life totally predicted that in your office pool, didn’t she?
  • A former business associate of Beyonce and Tina Knowles claims he was discriminated against because he’s black. It’s the guy’s most ridiculous lawsuit since claiming Clay Aiken discriminated against him because he’s gay.
  • The reigning Mr. Universe faces assault and resisting arrest charges after a run-in with police officers. If found guilty, the first runner-up from the X36R-299 galaxy will step in to assume his duties.
  • A train in France set a new speed record for rail travel. Not surprisingly, the train was leaving France.
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