BWE SLANG: “Making Number 3″

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NUMBER 3.JPGBWE would like to submit a new phrase into your pop culture lexicon. That phrase being the Making Number 3.” A definition:

MAKING NUMBER 3: c. 2007. (mā’kÄ­ng nÅ­m’bÉ™r thrÄ“). Making: The act of one that makes. Middle English, from Old English macian; Number: A member of the set of positive integers. From Middle English nombre. Three: The cardinal number equal to 2 + 1. Middle English, from three (…).

“Making Number 3″ is a term that implies that one has to, or already has, vomitted or thrown up or puked. Much like the term “Making Number 1″ (going pee pee) or “Making Number 2″ (having to sh*t), “Making Number 3″ can be used as a kindly way of insinuating that a vom-cano is about to erupt out of ones mouth. Classy, trendy, catchy — Be one of the first people to turn “Making Number 3″ into a slang reality.

EXAMPLES:

“Is that a dead body? Oh god, outta my way, I’m bout to number three all over this peace.”

“You guys, I snorted so much sweet n’ sour mix at last night’s rager, I woke up in a pool of my own Number 3.”

“Seriously, I am so bulemic. No, literally, I’m such a bulemes. I Make Number 3 like 7 times a day you guys!!”

THINGS THAT WILL MAKE YOU GO NUMBER THREE:

1. THE TREE MAN OF INDONESIA: If you’ve never seen photos of Tree Man, be warned: It may cause a Number 3 explosion. Dede is a 35-year-old Indonesian man who has tree-like warts growing out of his body, which have turned him into a veritable Treebeard from LOTR. Photographic evidence:

TREE MAN 2.jpg

The good news is, Doctors were able to operate on Tree Man, and get rid of many of his tree-like growths:

TREE MAN 3.jpg

The bad news is, pre-op or post-op, my “bodily-function-o-meter” is crankin’ up to “3″ in a big way. (And BNE‘s Michael Cyril Creighton seems to agree.) Also, who do you guys think he’s texting right now? Shel Silverstein? The mind boggles.

More Number 3 Inducing Things After the Cut! Warning: Things get a little graphic, so click at your own risk…

2. SHAR PEIS WITH GROUND BEEF MOUTH:

This one is kind of sad, but Number-3-Inducing nonetheless… it’s a Sharpei with ground beef mouth…

SHARPEIMOUTH.jpg

My office deems these photos “The Worst Pictures On The Internet”, while Sloppy Joe deems them “Inspiring.”

TRI TWIST 1.jpg3. TRIDENT TROPICAL TWIST GUM: It pretty much tastes like you’re chewing Number 3, and if that’s not enough to make you GO Number 3, I don’t know what is.

4. MODERN DAY AL PACINO. Have you seen him lately?

AL PACHIN.jpg

5. TASTY BITE INSTANT INDIAN FOOD.

TASTY BUTE.jpg

This is the kind of thing that you eat, and then, once you’ve immediately Number Three’d it into the toilet, your puke looks back at you from the bowl and says “I told you so.”

6. THIS PICTURE OF ROBBIE WILLIAMS: NSFW and also MCYTN3. (May Cause You To Number 3.)

ED. UPDATE: An additional Number 7 for your enjoyment.

HINTS THAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO GO NUMBER 3:

  • Watering of the Mouth.
  • Tingling of the Jaw.
  • Excessive Burping.
  • General Malaise.
  • Your finger is jammed down your throat.

BONUS MAKING NUMBER 3 VIDEO:

Treeman Smoking!!!