This is a recap of the Lost episode “Shape of Things to Come” airing April 24, 2008 — if you haven’t seen the episode, DO NOT READ THIS, IT IS FULL OF SPOILERS. Car spoilers, I mean. Both the things you affix to the back of cars, as well as shocking revealed secrets about cars. About Ben’s SECRET car. Anyway, now that the wee ones have toddled off to bed…
THERE’S NO WAY THE DUDE’S ACTUALLY GONNA — OH. WELL. DIDN’T SEE THAT COMING.
This week, the faceless bullet-slingers that killed Karl and Rousseau in the cliffhanger mini-boss back on March 20 took Ben’s daughter Alex hostage. It’s still easy to believe that Ben intended this scenario when he gave Alex directions to the temple, but one thing he most certainly did not intend — nor did any non-sadist watching from home expect — was for Derek Jeter racially-ambiguous-haircut Sergeant to shoot Alex in the head execution style.
For the first time since he struck out with Juliette, Ben was rendered completely helpless in the situation, managing only to choke out the words “they changed the rules” and proving that even in his times of greatest personal tragedy, he still manages to be cryptic as hell. The “rules” likely refer to a prior agreement laid out with Charles Widmore, most likely — cue 50s sci-fi theramin — in the future?? I’m assuming Ben foresaw this whole scenario from the future and that’s why he willingly sent Alex into “danger” in the first place and somehow knew exactly what was happening during the attack before the Foley artists even arrived at the studio to start recording bullet sound effects.
Look at the bright side, though — after these last few deaths, maybe the opening credits will finish flashing before 10:30?
MY NAME’S DEAN MORIARTY, YA DIG?
If my offhand literary knowledge is correct (with a teeny line lifted from Wikipedia for good measure), “Dean Moriarty,” the alias Ben gave the hotel clerk, is the character from Jack Kerouac’s On The Road who “grew up in Colorado with a hobo/bum for a father for whom he searches on many occasions. Dean’s fanatic personality races from journey to journey and pulls other people along.”
Sounds a little like what Desmond was going through a few episodes ago, doesn’t it? Perhaps Ben is jumping in time with, as a friend of mine suggested, Widmore as his constant? This would explain “You know I can’t kill you,” as well as Ben’s random disappearance into his crawlspace then immediate emergence with a plan, plus Ben asking the hotel clerk about the date and year. It would also add gravity to Widmore’s “good luck finding Penelope” line if time is in the equation, in addition to explaining Ben’s apparent ubiquity on the mainland.
Alright, so I really just want to see Ben lovingly pull out a picture of Ol’ Constey Widmore during a time warp in a later episode. I’m human.
WHO WOULD’VE THOUGHT KILLING SAYID’S WIFE WOULD INVITE SOME SORT OF VENGEANCE?
In another flash-forward from the Ben/Sayid touring Vaudeville duo, Sayid hunts down and shoots Ishmael Bakir (Moby Dick alert! Down to just three books left that haven’t been referenced on this show — Dracula, Dear Mr. Henshaw, and Bill Engvall’s autobiography), whom Ben claims was hired by Widmore to kill Sayid’s wife. While Ben really gives no indication that this information is false — besides his Ben-ass smirk when Sayid proclaims his loyalty to the island’s cause and asks for his next target — he’s also still Ben, so who knows if Ishmael was just some guy he needed dead for some other reason. Does anyone have trouble believing that Ben wouldn’t just conduct some harmless facts to ensure Sayid remains loyal and fired-up?
After this week’s murder and Ben’s vow to kill Penelope in exchange for Widmore’s man killing Alex, is it possible the show is headed towards being some sort of giant, island version of Hamlet? With time warping and smoke monsters and teleporting cabins? I think the first four seasons are still shorter than the Branagh movie version (topical zinger!)
IS THERE A DOCTOR IN THE SURF?
There is exactly one — the one from the ship, and his throat had been cut and he’d clearly been in the water for some time (if I learned anything from “Cast Away” other than FedEx risks their lives for you). Nervous Nellie Farraday sends a Morse Code message to the ship and receives one back that he claims says “a helicopter is on its way,” but Bernard — one of three living humans who can interpret Morse Code, along with Farraday and this dude — tells Jack and Kate that the message actually says “what are you talking about? doctor is fine.”
At this point, Jack finally grows skeptical of InformationWithholdey McGuffin and forcefully gets Daniel to confess that the Other Others aren’t actually there to rescue the Oceanic survivors. Jack then yelled at Daniel, “Wait a minute — I’ll bet Ben’s man on the boat is Michael, isn’t it?? Eureeka!”
ALSO, THIS EPISODE WAS CO-DIRECTED BY THE ZUCKER BROTHERS
Extra 1: Hey, what’s going on?
Sawyer: Get inside, now!
[Extra 1 gets shot]
Extra 2: Whoa, what was that?
Sawyer: Get inside, now!
[Extra 2 gets shot]
Extra 3: What were those two gunshot-sounding noises I just heard?
Sawyer: Seriously, get inside, now!
[Extra 3 gets shot]
Then a clown comes out next and gets shot, followed by a deaf man, then a dog, then some cameo celebrity, and so on.
Oh, also, Claire was in a house when it completely exploded. She’s doing fine, but she was on the ground for a couple seconds after the house she was in completely exploded.
Double also, did anyone else expect for a split-second that Kate was just gonna take her top off in the opening shot? How awesome would that have been if right from the getgo, Lost was just like “Hey, we’re back. Aaaaaaaand there’s boobs now.”
Leave all thoughts, theories, observations, and general inanity in the comments, please, especially if you have traveled to the future and can lay some spoilers on us. For example, you might say “in 2011, tv decides to spread its good shows out over at least two nights.”