Jen & John Running Down The Aisle


Here’s an idea, world – maybe Jennifer Aniston is happy being single. Did anyone ever think about that? Maybe she enjoys just dating a hot 29-year old with tattoo sleeves, kicking him out of her bed whenever she wants so she can enjoy sleeping alone in her clean sheets. Perhaps she is perfectly content running out to do yoga in the morning, without having to drag her bratty kids to preschool beforehand. What the hell is so wrong with that?

But, blah blah blah, she’s allegedly obsessed with getting married, because we’re obsessed with her getting married. The country has become a pair of whiny old people and Jennifer Aniston is our single granddaughter who we so desperately want to wed off. But hey, she might be doing it with John Mayer, in a relaxed, backyard celebration! Courtney and CoCo Cox will be her wedding party, and everything will be perfect. We couldn’t be more excited – or relieved. [Ok!]

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