John McCain Launches “Historical Candidacy Lite”

|

capt.1b8e7bf6280b4fde904b3ef87c9ff9c4.cvn_mccain_veepstakes__ny108.jpgDENVER — By picking Gov. Sarah Palin from Alaska to be his vice president, John McCain now boasts the only barrier-breaking presidential campaign option with all the same “hope and change stuff” taste that’s high in still feeling good about yourself, but with 0 black guys ending up in the white house. McCain’s announcement of his shrewd decision to select a relatively inexperienced and previously unknown woman to share his presidential ticket – which would have been a landmark move were he not running against a charismatic black man whose own historical campaign for the presidency has been steadily building momentum following his narrow victory over a female politician whose achievements were actually remarkable – came only hours after Obama captured the hearts and minds of a nation with his deeply inspiring remarks last night in Denver, but McCain’s people assure us this coincidence of timing was in no way intended to dilute the impact of Obama’s dramatic and historic speech. So far, McCain’s announcement was been met with predictable point-missing. “Wait, so no matter what happens, there’s either gonna be a black guy or a woman in the white house? That’s awesome!” said some voter who is easily manipulated by cynical politicking and feeble media-sensationalizing. “I mean, I’m all for women and black people and stuff, but maybe we should start slow, like with the Vice Presidency, you know?”, added some white guy.

related stories
you might like
Powered By Zergnet