Random Couple Update: Kate Hudson Wants A-Rod’s Baby

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Fools Gold A-RodAccording to In Touch Weekly sources (in gossip mags, “sources” usually means “hyperfacts”), Kate Hudson wants to bear the love child of Yankees slugger / great-public-image-haver Alex Rodriguez.

Take it away, speculative-ass friend quote:

…A friend of hers explains: “She just turned 30 and she’s ready to have her second child. She wants Ryder to have a sibling, so she brought up the idea to Alex and told him that they would make a beautiful baby together, and that she would assume all financial responsibility.”

I don’t know, this sounds pretty speculative (except the part about all financial responsibility, cause that’s definitely how people talk when they’re planning to have a kid, plus it’s not like A-Rod makes $850 mil a year or anything). I need some concrete evidence that Kate Hudson wants to have A-Rod’s love child.

Thankfully, here is that concrete evidence:

Kate has even introduced Alex to her mom, Goldie Hawn, and Goldie’s partner, Kurt Russell, who accompanied her to Yankee Stadium on August 8 to watch the Yankees play the Boston Red Sox. “They cheered when Alex was at bat and he smiled at them when he was on third base,” says an onlooker.

OH MY GOD SHE’S PREGNANT AS SH*T. Oh, she’s not yet? Well she will be, cause if an onlooker saw them cheering while Alex was at bat, that means they are effing without a condom on. Also, everyone else in Yankee Stadium was cheering when Alex came to bat, so they’re probably also f***ing.

Also, “Hello Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell, I am Alex Rodriguez” sounds like the opening line to a MAD TV sketch. Which is usually a good omen for things happening in real life.

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