No Longer Snookin’ For Love

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snooki-kissing

“Jersey Shore” dancing machine Snooki has found her juice-head. The lucky guy is named Emilio Antonio (Italian. Check.), moonlights as a bodybuilder (Gorilla. Check.), and works at the gym (G.T.L. Triple Check!). Says Snooki:

“He is just like my typical guido juicehead with like a good personality. I am really excited to like show the public who he is. He is freaking banging. We’re the sexiest couple I have ever seen in my entire life so I am excited for everybody to see that.”

We’re thrilled for the lil’ lady that she’s locked up a Valentine’s Day date, but we’re sure she’s leaving a trailer of heartbroken suitors in her wee wake. Let’s all let out a collective “Wahhhhhhhhhh” for all the guys that could have found love with Princess Poof. Maybe Angelina is available?

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