Heidi Montag must be a disciple of The Secret, because she believes in herself more than anyone else we can think of. How else can you explain her delusions that she is a real motion picture actress? Also, why does she always call movies “motion pictures”? (She’s also a fan of calling them “feature films,” it’s a delightfully old-fashioned moniker, wethinks). We’ve done some digging around and found some of her recent Tweets and interviews where she displays more confidence in her acting than is realistic, but maybe it’s an elaborate attempt to brainwash us. It’s like the idea that if you keep telling a lie over and over, people will start to believe it.
Last week, Heidi told People, “I’m so excited The Hills is finally over and I can now become a full time motion picture actress. There is no better training [for an actor] than being in front of the cameras 24-7.” She also added “I’m now finally free to start my career and my new life as female mogul in Hollywood!”
On her Twitter today, she lauded her firearm skills, saying ”I want to be blonde tomb raider. I’m better with guns then both Angelina (Jolie) and Megan Fox put together!”
She also Tweeted earlier this month about being cast in the upcoming Adam Sandler film Just Go With It, writing “getting ready for day 2 of filming for the comedy feature film!!!!!!! I’m SOOOO excited!” and “getting hair and makeup for the comedy feature film I’m filming today! so excited! my first movie!” and then there was this one “memorizing my script for the feature comedy movie I am filming all next week”.
During a visit to The Tonight Show, she told Jay Leno that firing husband Spencer Pratt was the best thing she did for her career, saying “I kind of just woke up one morning and was like, ‘You know, you’re fired, but have a great day and I’ll talk to you soon. After that is when I got all my movie roles. I think I’m better handling [my business affairs] myself.” All one of her movie roles.
But what of creating scripts for herself? Not to worry, Heidi has written a movie for herself that sounds fantastic. ”I am making the first 3-D beach comedy about a shark that attacks a small beach town and I save the day with my 3-D boobs.” Just…wow. Major motion picture feature, indeed.
After working with Ron Howard on a Funny or Die short, she said “I was honored to work with the amazing Ron Howard. He made me feel confident in my talent. I am so excited about my acting future. I can’t wait for my next role to be as an action star! This is just the beginning of a whole new world for me.”
It’s funny because in the weeks before her Funny Or Die role, all of Montag’s Tweets were about her plastic surgery. And her “designing career”. And before that, they were about her “music career”. We’re not saying she can’t multitask, but maybe she should master one before moving on to the next.
[Photo: Getty Images]