Dentist Offers To Fix Crystal Bowersox’s Teeth For Free. Uh, Thanks?

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Here’s our favorite news today of the “unsolicited offers and backhanded compliments” variety. A “dentist to the stars” (ugh) in New York City has offered to fix American Idol singer Crystal Bowersox‘s teeth for free to make her look more media-friendly. Because God forbid she wins the show and has anything but a Seacrest-y, unnaturally white smile.  Dr. Laura Torrado wrote to Movieline.com to get this message to Crystal:

“I’d like to offer you complimentary oral reconstructive services and do anything and everything from whitening you teeth, to closing your gaps. We don’t have to make your teeth perfect like every other Hollywood celebrity, because that’s not who you are.

We can really make sure that everyone sees you as beautiful and confident on the outside as we all know you are on the inside.”

So basically Crystal, the jig is up. Everyone knows you’re not confident because of your damn chompers. You may as well quit the show like you maybe-possibly threatened to do before, because how can you possibly be a success with a mouth like that? Sigh. Is it any wonder she might be sick of Hollywood already?

[Photo: Getty Images]

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