Never ceasing for a minute to remind us that she does not remember she is still a kid, Taylor Momsen expounded recently on the development of her personal style, scoffing that, “I still wear pieces from when I was in f*cking middle school.”
Oh, you mean from LAST YEAR? You mean from five minutes ago? Do kids in middle school really have “pieces” now? If a giant t-shirt our grandma got us from Kissimmee-St. Cloud counts as a “piece,” then we have several pieces that we’re still incorporating into our wardrobe. And we’re almost one thousand years old! If that really is true about her middle school wardrobe…wow, that sounds like a middle school for criminals, by criminals. We don’t know about you, but our school had a strict No Exposed Garter Belts policy that they were really sticklers about.
Momsen continues, “I do myself up kind of like a doll. I have a doll collection and I look at their outfits and kind of imitate them.” What kind of horrifying doll could she possibly mean? Those dolls seem like they would be terribly inappropriate and need to be heavily Febrezed. All of her comments came in response to questions about why she fired her stylist, most likely after Momsen got tired of her suggestions like, “You should really put on actual clothes over your underwear,” and, “Seriously though, where are you parents right now?”