Jesse James Makes $100,000 On eBay Off Collectors Of Gross Ex-Husband Memorabilia

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In need of some cash to get Kat Von D’s tramp stamp colored to match his (we’re assuming), Jesse James‘ eBay sales have recently raked in a jaw-dropping $118,000. Not surprisingly, a lot of the items experienced a suspicious hike in value over the past couple months, the kind that comes when the item for sale belongs to a famous person. Or in this case, the lying, cheating ex-husband of a famous person. Even the items with legitimate value sold for some seriously inflated coin: a vintage motorcycle priced to move at $1,500 eventually sold for $30,302. Because who wouldn’t want to sit where a butt bearing Sandra Bullock‘s stiletto print once sat? That’s a piece of Hollywood history right there!

The most …egregious…item that was purchased, however, was a West Coast Choppers-themed soap on a rope. So, how much would someone pay for what was literally a bar of soap attached to a string? $76.95. Soap. On a rope. For $76.95. America, we are doing this to ourselves, really. We love celebrities as much as the next person, but come on. Close your browser and put those dollars toward your kid’s college fund. We just hope that it is the most effective, best smelling soap on the planet, because who ever bought it now has to live with the knowledge that he or she paid $80 FOR A BAR OF SOAP just because it belonged to Jesse James. Now, if you’ll excuse us, there are a couple of bids we need to go check on.