An Ode To Snooki’s Poof (R.I.P.)

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When the VMAs rolled in, Snooki held court
Now we all know that she’s really quite short
But something was different the night of the fete
Something was up with this particular guidette

Gone was the Elvis-like mound of hair
Snooki’s monumental poof just wasn’t there

“…I want to look more mature,” she said
While we couldn’t stop staring at her empty head.
“The pouf—I’ve been wearing it since I was 16…”
But your hair was every guidette’s dream!
“So why not switch it up?” She pled.
While we couldn’t help but feel misled.

Snooki then said something that made sense
And left us feeling just a tad bit dense
The new haircut is way more guido,
Much like the Situation‘s libido.
It says so much about the Jersey Shore
(We can hear JWwow sayin, “who you callin’ a whore?”)
It explains the favorite pastime of the gang,
As Snooki put it, “Now I have bangs…”

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