Sarah Palin Blurts Out That Dancing With The Stars Wanted Husband Todd, Not Bristol

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In her never-ending quest to make us feel so bad for her entire family, now Sarah Palin claims Dancing With The Stars wanted husband Todd, not Bristol as a contestant this season. Ouch, Mom! Says Palin, “They wanted Todd to be on the show. I think that would have been cool to see, too. But here Bristol is, out of her comfort zone, doing something all new.” The Palins! They’re just like us, if we were an insane family of attention-whores. Seriously though, this has to burn Bristol. It’s like finding our your prom date asked your father first, then only asked you because your dad said no. And then you said yes because you have no better options!

But taking her dad’s sloppy seconds wasn’t Bristol’s primary concern about going on DTWS. She was mainly worried about, you know, being a terrible dancer. Says Mama Griz, “In fact, when Bristol said, ‘I don’t know how to dance,’ I told her, just think of it as learning some basketball plays.” Ah yes, basketball: a graceful ballet of 6’8″ athletes thundering down the court to the sound of their own ACLs tearing. That advice probably explains Bristol’s sub-par performance this week, though we bet Todd would have burned up that floor like the beautiful man-demon he is. Ah well, maybe next season…

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