Spencer And Heidi Are Bankrupt, Karma Is Real

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Well, they faked divorce papers, we’re sure they can fake this too. The elaborate performance piece that Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag call their marriage has shifted into a new scene, and this one involves bankruptcy. According to Life and Style, the former Hills stars have blown $10 million, and now owe $2 million in back taxes. They are currently homeless and in talks with financial attorneys (or at least a guy hired to play one).

“We were immature, worrying too much about the famous part instead of the actual business part,” Spencer told Life & Style, earning him the world record for the longest time it took for someone to get a clue. “In hindsight, we shouldn’t have spent any of our money. We should have been low-key and saved.”

Instead they splurged on a $35,000-a-month love nest, six cars, private jets, magic crystals, and making Heidi’s breasts big enough to be recognized by the UN as an independent nation. Now the couple are holed up in Spencer’s parent’s house to plan their next move. Heidi was even considering appearing fully nude in Playboy, but chose not to at the request of the Pratt family.

According to Spencer, their problems -like so many in this world- are because of Jersey Shore. “We thought The Hills was going to be like 90210 and we’d have another five to 10 years. The ratings were consistent. But we never saw Jersey Shore coming. Before, TV audiences were fine with seeing us all argue, but now they want you to punch one another in the face and hook up with three different people. Our cast was a bit boring and snoozeworthy in comparison. No wonder we got canceled.”

But Spencer mans up and takes his share of the responsibility. “We don’t want sympathy. We did this to ourselves and feel like idiots. But we’ve grown up and are definitely not as naive anymore.” Honestly,  there’s so much drama around these two we don’t know what’s real anymore. Is it possible for a marriage to jump the shark? Because we think it just did.

[Photo: Images]