The Fast and the Furious franchise found a way to keep the alliteration alive with Fast Five. And now they’re in Rio! In it, George Clooney and Brad Pitt lead a gang of master criminals in an elaborate heist to knock off a-oh, wait. No, what happens is Paul Walker and Vin Diesel go on a roadtrip where they learn a lot about themselves, life and love and then drive a car off a cliff. Wait, that’s not it either. Just watch:
I realize I forgot to mention Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s torrid love affair with Vin, culminating in The Rock stealing Vin’s wallet. Not cool, The Rock.