Could throwing a gigantic Twitter tantrum really have convinced CBS to offer Charlie Sheen his Two And A Half Men gig back? Do not tell our nation’s toddlers. According to NBC news correspondent Jeff Rossen, “Sources close to Charlie Sheen tell NBC News, CBS has offered him his job back. Discussions ongoing. Not a done deal,” later adding, “Per my sources: CBS is happy to have Charlie Sheen back on show…IF Warner Bros, Chuck Lorre, and Sheen can settle differences.”
Considering that Sheen is currently suing Lorre and Warner Bros for $100 million, in addition to calling Lorre an “ugly whore,” we doubt that’s an agreement that’s going to come easily. Then again, maybe Charlie can hold his breath until his face turns purple and he thrashes around in the middle of the supermarket aisle. It’s not mature, but if our pre-school years taught us anything, it’s effective.
Sure, you might be thinking, Charlie’s burned so many bridges, he’d have to take a hot-air balloon back to his home network, but that’s not the only obstacle standing in CBS’s way. The network might hope to be bi-winning again, but meanwhile Sheen is hinting at a project on Fox. “#Foxball; Perhaps a new lair…..? A Fox and a Warlock? epic,” Sheen tweeted with a photo of his TV menu set to Fox. It’s like Charlie Sheen’s parents are divorced and he’s playing them off each other to get exactly what he wants: a new Wii, Oh no, sorry, we meant millions upon millions of dollars.