Charlie Sheen Ticket Sales Hurting, But Vanilla Ice Still Loves Him

|

Turns out America may not be as excited to see Charlie Sheen rant on stage for 70-minutes as originally thought. Despite word of early sell-outs for his upcoming tour, CNBC says scalpers are selling Sheen tickets for less than face value. Could it be that watching the sitcom actor’s public meltdown was a less than committed interest for Joe Average? Whether it’s because people no longer think they’ll see the seemingly calming Sheen implode—or they don’t actually want to be there when he does—it’s possible that America’s love affair with tiger blood may be fading fast.

One person who does still care about Charlie is Vanilla Ice, who suggested Sheen sign up for England’s Dancing On Ice, on which ‘Nilla placed 7th. “Charlie Sheen on Dancing on Ice would be great—it would lick him into shape. Charlie doesn’t know his purpose. He’s got all the money in the world, just like me. But it doesn’t matter about money. It’s about your purpose in life and your stability—and he has none of that…I wanted to give him advice because he has kids.” Charlie may not appreciate it now, Ice, but someday he’ll remember that you suggested he join a British reality ice skating competition, and realize that the love he was searching for was here all along.