Put down your #biwinning t-shirt and listen to us. No seriously, put it down. We’re sorry to tell you this, but we might be looking at a Two And A Half Men without Charlie Sheen. The Hollywood Reporter claims that producer Chuck Lorre has proposed a Sheen-less sitcom to Jon Cryer. Unfortunately for Lorre, he has to get his plan in place by May 18, in order to present in the newly formatted show to advertisers at the network’s upfronts. In addition to previously mentioned stars like Jeremy Piven rumored to be joining the program, names like Woody Harrelson and Bob Saget have been mentioned in conjuncture with the reboot. Personally, we don’t know if either of those actors would necessarily fit the bill. Based on the 3/4 of an episode we saw a few years ago in which Charlie, no joke, slept with an entire coven of witches, Sheen is the carefree yin to Cryer’s anxious yang, the slutty cream to his buttoned-up coffee. Even ifÃ‚Â Two And A Half Men‘s Angus T. Jones qualifies as a grown-up by now, we still need half a man to break even!
Unfortunately, not everyone familiar with the show is optimistic about the show’s post-warlock survival. TMZ reports that the fact no offers have officially been made to replacement actors is a bad sign. One insider even predicts a Two And A Half Men cancellation in Lorre’s future, claiming “There really is a good chance the show won’t come back.” Our suggestion? Get an actor even more uptight than Jon Cryer, then slide Jon over to the bad boy role. Call up David Hyde Pierce from Frasier. You know he’s just waiting by the phone anyway.