Sometimes when I go to the gym, like never, the choice of machines can be overwhelming. You’ve got your treadmill, your stairmaster, your elliptical machine, your machine that looks like an escalator with a drop-off to hell, your weird heavy nautical ropes contraption, that thing that makes your legs spread wide open, etc. It should be obvious to anyone with eyes or a car back-up sensor that it is rare for me to get on any of these machines, unless I’m staying at a hotel and want to feel “urbane.” The gym is no fun. Right?
Here’s a fat ass cat working his puffy lil tail off on an underwater treadmill, set to the most sensuous, love-making song my ears have ever wrapped up and taken in.
I think our feelings about working out can be best summed up with this GIF:
Or this one:
Or… this one.
In short, unless my trainer is named Mr. Fluffclumps and rewards me in tiny little morsels of beef, I’m probbbbaaaably not going to get anywhere physically anytime soon. And with that, I bid you adieu.
**Drives Rascal out of the room while waving.**