Train Sells “Drops Of Jupiter” Wine For No Comprehensible Reason


Introducing the band Train’s Drop Of Jupiter wine, which finally solves  the question, “What would compel somebody to wear high heels while they’re exercising?” It does not, however, answer the question, “What person on the face of the planet would possibly buy Train wine?”

Besides being named after Train’s Billboard 100 Top 5 hit, Drops Of Jupiter the beverage is just one of the many vintages available through Train’s wine club, for those whose refined palates will not allow them to drink a beverage not carefully selected by a band most popular in 2001. Drops will be a 2009 Petit Sirah and, we’re assuming, taste remarkably like the best soy latte that you’ve ever had…and pee. With bottles priced at $9.99, you’ll be dancing along the light of day and head back toward the Milky Way in no time, or more likely, dancing on your neighbor’s lawn while the cops ask you please, for the last time, to put your top back on.

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