Fresh off 2007’s cumbersomely-titled (but surprisingly good) fourth Die Hard installment Live Free Or Die Hard, the Dying Hard franchise has just announced a fifth Die Hard movie starring Bruce Willis and given it the official title: A Good Day To Die Hard.
Like many other shrewd franchises, Die Hard has chosen not to give its sequels convenient numbers, and instead given them increasingly long and roundabout titles that no one will ever say. In support of this chaotic but amusing trend, we offer up our own suggestions of Titles For The Next 10 Die Hard Sequels:
1. A-E-DIE-O-U And Sometimes Hard
2. IIIIIIIIIIIII Just Wanna Die (Hard)
3. Sex, Dies And Hardiotape
4. Get Busy Livin’ Hard Or Get Busy Dyin’ Hard
5. Die Hard: The Hardquel
6. Apple DIE a la Harde
7. Die Hard: Hardy Never Dies
8. I Believe Terminal Patients Should Have The Right To Choose When They Die Hard
9. Don’t Turn Around Oh Oh Oh, DIE Kommis-HARD’s In Town
10. Bruce Willis Has Literally Just Died Hard
Other Die Hard sequel names? I mean stupid made-up ones, not my actually accurate ones that are going to come true. Feel free to throw ‘em in the comments.