Jersey Shore‘s Italy vacation comes to an end this Thursday, and so too does a love that dare not scream its name, even when it’s throwing its girlfriend’s mattress out onto the roof. Yes, that’s right: Us Weekly reports that Jersey Shore‘s Sammi and Ronnie have broken up. Okay, okay, we know, but it’s coming from the horse’s mouth while he’s in an uninebriated state this time, and something tells us it’s legit. “We are not together,” Ronnie confirmed Tuesday at a screening of Paranormal Activity 3 in NYC. And if he’s not bringing his lady to Paranomal Activity 3, you know it must be real. That’s like dating 101!
It’s been two years and four seasons for the tumultuous couple, who somehow managed to survive Ronnie’s complete meltdown at the end of season three, and well, the more minor meltdowns at the beginning of season four. If you’re thinking to yourself, “Why should I believe this when these two have broke up literally dozens of times before, only to get back together in some tear-soaked reunion?,” the answer isÃ¢â‚¬Â¦well, you shouldn’t. They’ll probably get back together before you finished reading this sentence. Right…now!