Check out the balls on this guy. He’s Wesley Warren Jr., and while it’s easy to make fun of a guy with 98 pounds testicles, it’s also the worst thing in the world after the man whose hands and legs are made from tree. Wesley suffers from scrotal lymphedema, an illness that causes the lymph nodes in his delicate parts to swell to an ungodly size. His testicles are so large, it appears he can’t even wear normal pants, but rather a hooded sweatshirt on his legs with which to delicately cradle his sensitive parts.
Oh and by the way: Wesley only came down with these giant balls after he believes he slept wrong on his formerly normal-sized testes back in 2008. Meaning the lesson of this article is clear: Wrap your balls in bubble paper before falling asleep.
According to Warren, the operation to remove these guys is going to cost $1 million, which seems kinda steep. I mean, I assume they’re just gonna cut em off, right? Like not try to salvage anything? Seems like at this point, you should just count your losses and take infertility over giant ballitility.
Well this doctor tries really hard to convince us that $1 million is just exactly how much it will cost to rid Wesley of this embarrassing deformity, money which the dude just doesn’t have. Until now. Because if history has taught us anything, it’s that the way to raise $1 million for a guy with 100 pound b’s is making him an internet meme. So watch this video guilt free! (And then donate! Info below.)
To help Wesley out, head over to Paypal and donate what you can to firstname.lastname@example.org. If you laughed, give what you can so that God doesn’t one day give you balls tucked into a hooded sweatshirt.
(The Sun via Norman Baker whom I will never forgive.)