Congrats are due to Rosie O’Donnell! The 49-year-old announced on her new OWN Network show that she’s engaged to Michelle Rounds. Her publicist told Us Weekly that The Rosie Show host will wed her lady love over the Christmas holiday. Rosie was previously married to longtime partner Kelli Carpenter, with whom she has four children. They split in 2007.
In October, Rosie called into The Howard Stern Show and gushed about her relationship with Rounds, telling Stern that marriage was “in the cards.” She also compared her to Julianne Moore (hawt!) and said her kids already introduced her as their “step-mom.” Now we just want to know if the comic superstar is gonna to drop the O’Donnell in favor of ‘Rosie Rounds.’ It’s the cutest name ever — we say embrace it!
[Photo: Getty Images, Twitter]
Planes: the famous person’s natural enemy. What is about cruising at 30,000 feet that makes celebrities want to get rip-roaring drunk, start a screaming match and/or pee on the floor? Is it the change in air pressure? The overwhelming number of options in SkyMall? Or, are celebs always doing crazy stuff and a plane is just the one place where their P.R. team can’t hustle them away when things go south? Big & Rich’s John Rich was yanked from a Southwest flight yesterday after the singer started a drunken argument with fellow passengers before boarding, and remained too visibly inebriated to fly once on the plane. “Our crew assessed the situation and determined that the passenger was not fit for travel under governing federal aviation regulations,” Southwest’s rep says in a statement. Did we mention the flight was at 10:50 a.m.? Just to remind John that he’s in good company, here are seven of our favorite celebrities vs. plane stories, in order of increasing insanity:
7) Brooke Mueller: News that Charlie Sheen’s former spouse got removed (or removed herself) from a flight from L.A. to Cancun this past summer, after flight attendants refused to let her use the bathroom during takeoff, is sadly one of the more normal things we’ve heard that Brooke has done this year.
[This is a personal rant delivered from high atop my soapbox.*]
I was pretty psyched to hear that Rob Pattinson was at La Poubelle on Saturday, because I hang out there sometimes too, and it always feels good to have your nightlife choices validated by celebrities who are much richer and more attractive than you. La Poubelle is right next to the UCB Theatre where I’m a performer, and sometimes my friends and I go there to get drinks and dinner after our shows. Just a couple of weeks ago, I was there with a bunch of my guy friends. We had to stand close together because the bar was packed, so sometimes our bodies touched. When I wanted to tell my friend Joe something, like about how delicious the sliders were, I had to lean in and put my face right next to his ear because it gets loud in there. I may have also touched his shoulder while doing this. Later that night, I drove a bunch of my friends home because we all live near each other, we like designated drivers and it makes us feel good to act like we’re helping the environment. Then I went and hung out with my husband, who I’ve been with since 2003.
But somehow, when poor Rob does the same exact thing, some fans, celebrity sites and tabloids take a meaningless, fun night out and turn it into the cheating scandal of the century. I’m all for enjoying the world of celebrity, but speculating about things so far as you are essentially writing fiction about another person’s life is not cool. At all. Neither is exaggerating the circumstances to the point where a friend is suddenly “his mystery woman!” or insinuating that Rob is cheating just to grab some page views.
Madonna has been officially booked for the next Super Bowl Halftime Show (though reports of The Puppy Bowl hiring Meowdonna for their Kitty Halftime Show remain unconfirmed). So what songs should we expect to hear from the Kingess of Pop? Let’s use our knowledge of past Super Bowl Halftime Shows to find out!
As we should all know by now, the 5 Main Characteristics Of Super Bowl Halftime Show songs are:
2) Big Groups Of Fans / Children / Ethnic Firefighters Or Whatever can dance to it
3) Not too obscene or suggestive (#BOOBGATE: NEVER FORGET)
4) Something the artist wants to promote, either a new song or a classic that our moms ask us to download for them the next day
5) Allows a guest star to join the artist onstage (This is the biggest guarantee of all)
With those five criteria in mind, here are the 8 Most Obvious Song Choices For Madonna’s Super Bowl Halftime Show:
Ugh, this is like the 2008 elections all over again, except without the indelible historical consequences. WE HOPE. Having been named People‘s Sexiest Man Alive last month, Bradley Cooper appeared on Britain’s The Graham Norton Show to acknowledge what the majority of America seem to believe: Ryan Gosling is even sexier than he. “It’s so awful that I’m admitting this, but the hell with it: There was such a backlash when they announced it. Ryan Gosling, who I love, and I just made a movie with him and he’s the greatest,” Bradley says, remarking of recent paparazzi photos: “He literally looks like he’s in a photo shoot, like he just came off the runway. The peacoat is like this, with the scarf! And then there’s ones of me, and I literally look like the neighbor who never comes out of his house.” So what happens to the universe when the Sexiest Man Alive has his own Sexiest Man Alive? We feel like a wormhole might open up. On the other side of that wormhole? George Clooney, rubbing his hands together and biding his time.
We know how it gets at this time of year. You’re invited to a million different events, you don’t always have time to shop for new outfits for them, since you’re really supposed to be shopping for presents for other people. So you’re stuck either recycling party dresses from past events, borrowing friends’ dresses, or running into a store, blindly grabbing the first thing you see and changing in the restroom at work. This is what we imagine happened to Parker Posey, Fergie, Chloe Sevigny, LeAnn Rimes and Kevin McHale over the weekend. We really doubt they looked in the mirror before attending the special screening of W.E. at MoMA in New York and the Trevor Project’s Trevor Live! event in Hollywood. They just have more important things to do. See for yourselves…
[Photo: Getty Images]
Well this could get awkward. After years of watching films and television specials where lovers get married, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s children are starting to wonder why their parents haven’t also tied the knot. Obviously they’re too young to understand the complexities of pre-nups. “They have asked, because people get married in the movies,” Angelina says in her Nightline interview, which is set to air tonight. “Shrek and Fiona are married, you know?” We guess the “living together” phase was glossed over in the Shrek franchise. Luckily mother Angie knew just how to defuse what could be a tricky discussion topic. “We’ve explained to them that our commitment, when we decided to start a family, was the greatest commitment you could possibly have,” she says. “Once you have six children, you’re committed.”
In other Brangelina Brood news, the kids are now proud owners of an anti-jet lag device. The future is now, you guys! Brad and Angelina shelled out for the gizmo to help their kids sleep despite their constant travels through time zone. The machine consists of a lighting apparatus that helps your body adjust to the time changes. The technology had previously only been available on private jets and extremely high end first class cabins, but obviously the power duo pulled some strings. Let’s see Shrek and Fiona do that!
[Photo: Getty Images]
You better watch out. You better not cry. You better not pout, or else Lady Gaga is going to drive her sexy mutant nightmare cycle over your precious Christmas tree. We’re just kidding! Sure, the festive red studs and bizarro bike Lady Gaga was rocking at KIIS FM’s Jingle Ball in Los Angeles on Saturday made us secretly wish Santa would sit Xmas out this year, but Gaga is no grinch. You know she’d stuff your stocking with the things you really want: whiskey, sunglasses you can’t actually see out of, and sunblock for your constantly exposed lower abdomen. The whole idea just fills us with warm Christmas cheer. Or maybe that’s the whiskey. Either way, you know Gaga’s not going to eat those cookies you left out, right? That lower abdomen is not going to maintain itself!
[Photo: Getty Images]
I like Viggo Mortensen, but had to double-check his birthdate after seeing that New York Times Magazine cover. He’s 53. Cool, just checking! You may resume chewing on your arm in 1993 attire.
Also: Viggo Mortensen is the band Mudhoney. Who knew?
Jennifer Aniston, you have our deepest sympathies. It’s always difficult finding a boyfriend your dad truly approves of, especially when he’s grown so used to the parade of hunks stopping by for an awkward handshake. After having the honor and pleasure of being Mr. Brad Pitt‘s father-in-law, even America’s finest man meat must pale in comparison. Luckily for Jen, it looks like her soap star father John Aniston is onboard with her current boo Justin Theroux. “He’s a charming young man,” the Days of Our Lives actor told US Weekly about Jen’s gentleman friend. “I think they make a wonderful couple.” Squee! Oh, old dads are the more adorable! According to Dad-inston, he and his wife “get together whenever we can” with the Wanderlust costars. Well, looks like we can cross another name off the “Who covered Justin’s motorcycle with foul bologna slices?” suspect list. The search continues!
[Photo: Splash News Online]