Angelina Jolie, we know you’re beautiful and wealthy and have lips like two heavenly sofa cushions that God himself would sit upon if he were 2 inches tall, which he might be because he’s God and therefore can be as big or small as he chooses. That being said, it touched our 13-year-old dork hearts to hear you admit that you don’t really have many friends. “Well, I have a few girlfriends. I just … I stay at home a lot,” you confess in your upcoming Marie Claire interview. “I don’t do a lot with them, and I’m very homebound.” Between your six kids and Brad Pitt, we’re not surprised you don’t don’t get out much! We guess your kids are sort of like friends, right? Friends that throw up a lot and constantly have runny noses and cry at the drop of a hat. Hey, sounds like we have the same friends!
Besides, you’ve been busy directing In the Land of Blood and Honey, which comes out February 16 next year. “I talk to my family,” you continue. “I talk to Brad. … But I don’t know, I don’t have a lot of friends I talk to. He really is the only person I talk to.” Oh Angie, no. Don’t be that girl. Come hang with us. We can get a 12-foot party sub and eat it from either end! It is Friday, after all.
[Photo: Getty Images]