Adele Denies Reports That She Has A Sex Tape

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Rumor has it that Grammy conqueror Adele really made a sex tape. Could it be true? Is there video footage of her rolling in the deep? Setting fire to the sheets?! Chasing pavement!?! We don’t even know what these puns mean anymore. But that’s OK, because apparently none of it’s true. Paparazzo Jean-Claude Elfassi published a report in the French tabloid Public claiming that he possessed a tape of Adele hooking up with the boyfriend that inspired her smash record 21. The article was backed up with cell phone pix purportedly of the British chanteuse “hitting the high notes.” But of course, it’s not really her. It’s just someone like her. Oops.

What’s the french for “sued so hard”? Because that’s exactly what’s gonna happen to Jean-Claude, as Adele is now taking legal action over the false account. She’s approached the famed law firm Schillings to represent her in the suit. “Our client has not appeared in a sex tape as claimed in the article,” they told the Daily Mail. “Our client does not appear in the photographs. Such claims are grossly defamatory.” And with that, we regret to inform you that we’re out of good Adele song puns.

[Photo: Getty Images]