FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION: Everything You Missed At The 84th Annual Academy Awards

|

Yes, it’s that time of year again. The Oscars! Hosted by Billy Crystal! And after sorting through thousands of photos from last night’s affair, we bring you the best pics from backstage at the Oscars, the Vanity Fair Party, the 20th Annual Elton John AIDS Foundation Viewing Party, and all the other soirees neither of us were invited to. So please, sit back, block some time, and let’s take a glance at the Oscar Photos They Don’t Want You To See:

MOST LIKELY TO BE RIDDING HER BODY OF TERMITES

Jennifer Lopez and Maybe That Little Girl In The Back



“COMING UP NEXT! N***AS IN PARIS!”

Nina Dobrev and Ian Sommerholder



WOMAN ACHIEVES THE RARE “DOUBLE JOLIE”

Kelly Lynch



IT’S AS IF ALL OUR MOMS MET ADAM LAMBERT LAST NIGHT

Steven Tyler and Adam Lambert




LISA KUDROWIEST

Jennifer Westfeldt and Jon Hamm



“DID I EVER TELL YOU ABOUT THAT TIME I WAS IN THE WAR?”

Mourielle Herrera and Rick Rubin


LOVELIEST FRONTWARDS CELINE DION BACKWARD TUX

Gwyneth Paltrow



NEW DREAM: BE CRADLED BY ELTON AND HANDED THIS ANIMAL

Sir Elton John, Zachary Furnish John, Fran Drescher & Katy Perry



LULU LEMONIEST

Diane Kruger



ROMANIAN DUVETIEST

Lily Collins



MALLARD FILLMORE

January Jones



WHY TRY TO GET WRITTEN UP IN A NEWSPAPER COLUMN WHEN YOU CAN BE A NEWSPAPER COLUMN?

Victoria and David Beckham



LITERAL FASHION ROADKILL

Elizabeth Olson



IDEAL CAST FOR RUSH HOUR 7

Puff Daddy and Ben Stiller



NIP? NIP?!? ARE YOU THERE? CAN YOU BREATHE??! NIP SAY SOMETHING!

Jennifer Lopez



JACKED PALANCE

Cameron Diaz



ASS AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE

Serena Williams, showing Cameron Diaz how it’s done



BRIDESMAID OF FRANKENSTEIN

Zoe Saldana



HOTTEST MANCANDY

Liam Hemsworth



SPORTS ILLUSTRATED SWIMSUIT COVER: IRAN EDITION

Kate Upton



THE EVENING’S FIRST GIANT OSCAR WINNER

George Clooney



LOOKING LIKE A MILLA-ION BUCKS

Milla Jovovich



MY NEW HAIR INSPIRATION AND ALSO I’M QUITTING FOOD 4VR

Rose Byrne



BOW NO SHE DIDN’T

Emma Stone



TIPS TO GET AHEAD FOR ASSPIRING ACTRESSES

J-Lo and Cameron



MOST LIKELY TO BE WATCHING A PLAYBACK OF HIMSELF SPACEBALLS-STYLE

Billy Crystal



LEGGY BUNDY

Angelina Jolie



WANT TO POINT OUT THAT THIS WOMAN FELT MY SPANX OVER MY DRESS ABOUT 3 WEEKS AGO, IE MY GREATEST MOMENT OF 2012

Octavia Spencer



LEG RYAN

Angelina Jolie



LOVING HIS MUSTACHE #NOHOMO

Bradley Cooper (And Tina Fey, Who Looked Awesome)



TAKEN ONLY SECONDS BEFORE THAT AWKWARD MOMENT WHERE SHE BUMPED INTO STACY KEIBLER

Meryl Streep



I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU SAY, I LOVE THIS

Elizabeth Banks



WAITING FOR THEIR BALANCE BEAM SCORES

J-Lo and Camcam



FANCIEST CHARLIE SHEEN SHIRT EVER

Melissa Leo



USING THIS PHOTO AS EXCUSE TO REMIND YOU THAT JESSICA SIMPSON IS STILL PREGNANT, 3 YEARS LATER

Molly Sims



THE DRESS I WOULD WEAR IF I WAS 5 FEET TALL AND INVITED TO THE OSCARS AND ALSO NATALIE PORTMAN

Natalie Portman in Vintage 1954 Christian Dior



THIS WOMAN F*CKS JAVIER BARDEM ON THE REGULAR, NEVER FORGET IT

Penelope Cruz



PERSON MOST LIKELY TO BE USED FOR N. KOREAN MISSILE PRACTICE

Sacha Baron Cohen



READY FOR A PANTSY DRESS PARTY

Sofia Coppola



HERE’S A PHOTO OF A LEGEND.

Joan Collins and Jay Leno



MENSCRAFTERS

J.J. Abrams and Simon Baker



THOU SHALL NOT PASS

Donald Sutherland



OSCAR I MOST WISH WAS MY FACE

Jean Dujardin



A REAL CALMUNIST

Victoria Beckham



SCIENTOLOGY, TAKE ME NOW

Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise



MOST CARELESS OSCAR RECIPIENT

Brett McKenzie



PORN I WOULD WATCH

Jean Dujardin and Thomas Langmann



“MOM? IT’S ME. I WON.”

Ludovic Bource



HOW MANY OTHER HOSTS DID THEY CALL BEFORE YOU BILLY?

Billy Crystal



MOBYIEST

Jim Rash



SHE DOESN’T CARE IF YOU KNOW HER NAME, AS LONG AS YOU CAN PICK HER SIDEBOOB OUT OF A LINEUP

Irina Shayk



HOTTEST ROBERTO BENIGNI

Jean Dujardin



MELANIE GRIFFITH LOOKED GREAT

Martin Landau



CONVERSATION THAT WAS PROBABLY SEAUUUUU SEXY AND FRENCH

Michel Hazanavicius and Jean Dujardin



BEST PRANK: ELECTRIFYING ALL DISPLAY LIQUOR BOTTLES

Missi Pyle



MOST LIKELY TO BE AN OLD SCHOOL LOONEY TUNES GANGSTER

Thomas Langmann



MEL GIBSON, ARE YOU READING THIS?

Dermet Oger



THIS EVIL WOMAN CLEARLY SKINNED THIS GUY

Lisa Eisner



TWO OUT OF THE FIVE PEOPLE ON MY LIST OF CELEBRITIES I’D LIKE TO DINE WITH

Martin Scorsese and Fran Leibowitz



FELL FOR THE OL ELECTRIFIED BOTTLE TRICK

Rick Rubin



PRETTIEST NIRVANA GROUPIE

Dave Grohl and Steven Tyler



HE’S ALREADY GOTTEN TO SECOND BASE WITH OSCAR

Jean Dujardin



NOT. ENOUGH. CUFFS.

Kourtney Kardashian and Kim Kardashian



LEAST CON-SEALED

Heidi Klum



MOST LIKELY TO BE PUT IN THE ATTIC AFTER NEW YEARS

Mena Suvari



SIMMERHOLDER

Nina Dobrev and Ian Somerhalder



“I GOT A DRESS, AND A MAN, AND I’M READY TO GO! SO I GUESS THAT’S PRETTY COOL. IT’S PRETTY COOL.”

Liam Hemsworth and Miley Cyrus



STEPHEN MOYER AND HIS DATE, THE GENIE MACHINE FROM BIG

Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer



BEST PAPARAZZI BITCHSLAP

Kelly Osbourne and Adam Lambert



BLACKEST SIGMUND FREUD

Taye Diggs and Idina Menzel



SLYEST ATTEMPT AT ABSORBING BEAUTIFUL YOUTH

Adam Lambert and Elton John



PRESENTING TIM BURTON’S NO DOUBT

No Doubt



LESS STAGED THAN GLEE. LESS STAGED THAN GLEE.

Ashley Fink and Chris Colfer



“THIS IS WHAT MY VAGINA WAS LIKE WHEN I WAS MARRIED”

Sir Elton John and Katy Perry



ALESSANDRA, STANDING NEXT TO HOW BIG HER NEWBORN WILL BE OUT OF THE WOMB

Alessandra Ambrosio and Kourtney Kardashian



THEIR FAVORITE CEREAL IS “FROSTED TIPS”

Ryan Kwanten and Sir Elton John



IS THIS ACTUALLY BAR RAFAELI’S ASS? OR IS IT HER TOP HALF AND SERENA WILLIAMS’ BOTTOM HALF, SHAKESPEARE HORSE STYLE?

Heidi Klum and Bar Rafaeli



ALWAYS WEARING ROSE-COLORED GLASSES

Rose McGowan



YOU GUYS, SOMEONE FORGOT UGGIE ON THE RED CARPET

Uggie



THANKS FOR READING

The Dog Of My Dreams

[Photos: Getty Images]

related stories
you might like
Powered By Zergnet