Charlize Theron, Jessica Simpson, Other Celeb Moms Totally Embarrassing Their Kids

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We’re sometimes under the illusion that motherhood has a calming effect on celebrities, making them less interesting to gossips and paparazzi. And then we remember Britney Spears (and, like, our own mothers). Nope, moms are people too, and that means they are bound to make their kids want to disown them. And the children of celeb moms have it even worse than the rest of us. This weekend gave us so many examples of things that would have made us stomp into our rooms, put on the “Keep Out!” sign and write frantically in our diaries how we would be the first documented case of dying of embarrassment.

1. Jessica Simpson wore this denim, snakeskin-patterned, ruffled tent to her baby shower. And still insists she’s having only one little girl.

2. Kris Jenner posted a photo of herself naked and pregnant with Rob Kardashian on her blog to wish him a happy birthday on Saturday. “Happy 25th birthday to my wonderful, handsome son, Rob!! Rob, you are the best son a mother could ask for and you make me proud every day. I love you so much!!”

3. Charlize Theron, who just last week confirmed that she adopted baby Jackson, accepted an award for being an Ally for Equality at the Human Rights Campaign Gala, and took a moment at the podium to tell presenter Michael Fassbender, “Your penis was a revelation. I’m available to work with it any time.”

4. Goldie Hawn seemed to have let it slip that daughter Kate Hudson has already married baby daddy Matt Bellamy, telling the Evening Standard last week, “When my daughter Kate married an English rock star [Matt Bellamy] it didn’t worry me; all that matters is that the relationship is a good one.” But then she quickly backtracked on Twitter, “Darling once again twisted the truth. They aren’t married. Xx.”

I mean, really. Is being fabulously rich and privileged worth all this mortification. (You should totally switch places with us, Kate/Jackson/Rob/unbornJSimpsondaughter.)

[Photos: Getty Images, KrisJenner.Celebuzz.com]

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