A Heartfelt Letter To Ashley Greene’s Stylist

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Hi Stylist,

We’ve wanted to talk to you for a very long time so we’re going to get straight to it. Your client, Ashley Greene, is a babe. A really hot, very popular babe who is scoring campaigns left right and centre. You know this because you dressed her for yesterday’s DKNY promotional event at Macy’s. This could be a very good gig for you. But still, you persist in dressing Ashley in … this? We don’t get it. Sure, every piece in this ensemble is branded with the best names on the fashion roster. But here’s what we’re looking at. A boxy leopard-print bolero that gives her no shape whatsoever, especially when paired with a high-waisted tan leather (but looks like pleather) skirt. The camera adds ten pounds, remember? But if you can add ten pounds to this body, considering what a fit gym bunny Ashley is, you’re doing something very, very wrong.

Look at the pictures in the middle and on the right. So much better, right? The vermilion top looks beautiful on her. And it actually goes with the skirt once you got rid of the heinous jacket. Sadly, the majority of pictures we saw have the offensive jacket on. Less is more. Although ‘more’ is great, if it doesn’t include ’80′s rejects. We have faith in you. You can do this.

XOXO,
The FABlife crew

[Photos: Splash News Online]