“Twilight! Hunger Games!” Russell Brand called out throughout his MTV Movie Awards opening monologue, knowing it’d be the tried and true way to get cheers, no matter what tasteless joke he made just before. Not that we don’t love those jokes too, especially this time, when they took a decidedly self-deprecating turn. First, after he praised Justin Bieber for allegedly beating up a paparazzo, with a nod to his own phone-tossing encounter with a photographer.
“If, after recent events you think it’s hypocritical of me to joke about celebrities beating up a paparazzi, wait till you see what I have to say about short lived celebrity marriages,” Russell quipped. Which would have been funnier, had the show producers not cut away to Jennifer Aniston, making things just, awkward.
Russell then decided to pick on/praise Kanye West and Kim Kardashian for “taking the pressure off” him — Kanye for making headlines the last time Russell hosted an MTV awards show at the 2009 VMAs, and Kim for having an even shorter marriage end just before his did. He also encouraged the new couple to return to the skill that made Kim famous in the first place: making a sex tape. Only, he cautioned Kanye against drinking before turning on the camera. “Learn the lessons of the VMAs: When you’re drunk, you do have a propensity to pounce on unsuspecting girls from the rear with a bottle in your hand.”
Though he said Charlie Sheen was on hand to take even more pressure off of him in the crazy antics department, Russell provided one more joke at his own expense, reminding everyone of how he met Katy Perry when he hosted the VMAs. “Last time I did an awards show I did end up marrying someone that was there. I’ll keep my eyes peeled for my next wife. Fassbender, it has to be,” he said, eying Michael Fassbender in the audience.
We loved it, but what did you think?
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