A Couple Of Wise Words To Lindsay Lohan As She Slips Into The Driver’s Seat Of Her Car

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Lindsay Lohan Driving Out Of Chateau Marmont

This headline feels like an ode. It may as well be, because we honestly felt like writing one when we saw pictures of Lindsay Lohan rolling out of the Chateau Marmont last night. Well, more a haiku, than an ode. If you would like to write one too, please do. We’ll trade notes! And this will help you nail your five-seven-five. You’re welcome.

Look Mama, no hands,
Is not a good look for you.
Try to focus, gurl friend.  

Essentially, this haiku condenses what we really want to say to Li.Lo. 

❖ You’re driving a car. Please put your hands on the steering wheel.

❖ When you have headlines like “Did Lindsay Lohan Lie To Cops About Her Car Crash?” and “Lindsay Lohan Hospitalized After Car Accident“, published about you, all the time, do try to pay more attention to the previous point.

❖ While you’re at it, maybe give Chateau Marmont a break for some time?

❖ Nice lipstick shade, even though it looks a bit smudgy.

❖ There’s something called a “designated driver.” It doesn’t have to be you.

❖ If you do insist on driving all the time, even though you don’t seem very good at it, try not to make faces like the one you’re making in the photograph below, too often. It’s scary.

Thank you, Lindsay. Looking forward to our next chat.

Lindsay Lohan Driving

[Photos: Splash News Online]

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