Read Our Favorite Parts From The Canyons Producer’s Over-The-Top Essay About Lilo

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Lindsay Lohan

Ah, but tell us how you really feel. Braxton Pope, producer on Lindsay Lohan‘s most recent film The Canyons, posted an essay about Lilo to the movie’s Facebook page today praising everything from Lindsay’s perfect fact to her “flawless” line reads to her classic style. The whole thing is so complimentary, we’d be inclined to think Lohan paid for the amazing publicity…except Braxton also zings Linday’s driving ability.”So, did I say good? She was actually great. Not that the shoot was without its challenges. Do I want to drive in a car with Lindz?,” Pope writes. “No. No I don’t. Ever.” Hmmm, that part seems to check out. We guess that means the rest of Braxton’s gushing is…true? Take a look at our favorite segments and let us know what you think:

  • It turns out the Lindsay Lohan/ Marilyn Monroe parallel is true! Maybe!: “Maybe it was being in Palm Springs recently where Marilyn Monroe is alive and well, looking at me from my hotel room at the Riviera, from the lobby of the Saguaro, a giant Marilyn statue on the main drag, or maybe it was Schrader’s interest in the John Huston film “The Misfits,” Marilyn’s last completed film as well as Clark Gable’s, but you can’t help but feel some parallels between Marilyn and Lindsay.”
  • Lindsay Lohan is the hotness: “She is what the French call ‘La Femme Eternelle.” She has a beauty, a facial architecture that is naturally stunning and best suited for capture with the least amount of makeup.”
  • If only Lindsay had been working in the ’40s: “Schrader terms the current Lindsay as ‘brassy’ and I think her husky voice and command of the screen evokes a certain toughness adding depth to her beauty. Add, of course, her charisma, that sine qua non of a true star, and that is what you get. I think she could be brilliant in a classic film noir.
  • Lindsay will blow your mind in every way: “It is impossible to not be impressed by Lindsay’s command of the script, her ability to run off pages and pages of dialogue flawlessly, her active and vital engagement in the storytelling, in camera angles, in the mechanics of filmmaking.”
  • On the other hand…some of this essay is really hard to swallow: “[A] brief thanks to Dina for the popcorn and beverages at casa Lohan while Lindsay was getting ready for some nighttime filming.” Say whaaaaa?

[Photo: Getty Images]

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