We can’t believe it’s been nearly five years since Kim Kardashian dropped trou for Playboy. We feel like it was only yesterday she was telling Glamour that she posed nude for the “independence,” claiming “I was always by the book, such the straight arrow when it came to pleasing my parents and being a good daughter.” Oh wait…that was just last year. Okay, so Kim has been getting a leverage from her various nude exploits for a long time. “These pics are from behind the scenes at my Playboy shoot back in 2007. Charlene Roxbourough styled me, Matt van Leeuwen did my makeup, Clyde Haygood did my hair and Hype Williams shot it!,” she posted with the photos. Based on the vintage pics, it seems like there were three key ingredients to Kim’s superior Playboy cover:
- Having a body so sick that makes us want to get eight gym memberships and join WeightWatchers thrice.
- Hiring a gentleman to maintain maximum artificial lip wetness at all times.
- Utilizing some kind of weird transparent plastic boob guards to…keep your chesticles in place? Prevent a nip slip at the moment when a nip slip would be most allowable? Man, now we have so many questions: did that jumper come with plastic chest guards? Are they made out of a special kind of plastic that’s easily erased by Photoshop, because they sure don’t appear in the final cover. Clearly they were worth it, as even the most virulent of Kim haters must agree she looks insanely good in her final cover photo.
[Photo: Twitter/ Playboy]